Oh, Poop!

This morning I had concepted a 'toon that consisted of only two words... and then I went "NAHHHHHHHH!" and started searching for poop euphemisms. Most of these I garnered from the 'net but I claim copyright on "Fudge Tetris".

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If Ronald Reagan was alive today I think he'd describe Washington, DC as "That shameless shitty upon a hill".

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Is it just me or, during press conferences, does Trump always sounds like he’s getting prompts through an earpiece and only partly understanding the information?

Trump: “The guy I just pardoned? What guy is that? Oh, wait… do you mean the, the Johnson guy? The Chinese guy? The guy with the thing, uh, the crypto farm in Bulgaria, uh, Sardinia? Oh, yeah. Great guy, wonderful guy, strong guy. It was so unfair that he got fifteen, no, five years.”

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(The following is just a peculiar work of fiction that may or may not be semi-autobiographical. Why am I sharing this? Hey, it's my blog. My rules. Besides, Penguin Books told me never to come back or they'd cut out my spleen with a shoe horn.)

The Sex Life of the Typical American Male: A Series of Firsts.
(Letters indicate imagined first names of women involved)

J: First boobs.
B: First premature ejaculation
K: First BJ
B: First rubber
B: First penetration
K: First virgin
T: First blind-drunk fuck
P: First married woman
C: First girl with rich parents
B: First one-nighter
Y: First crazy
F: First older woman.
S: First long-term sexual relationship
J: First adultery
A: First nympho
H: First hysterectomy
P: First mother
G: First erectile dysfunction
J: First chemically-enhanced interlude
Q: First hooker
U: First Epstein Island visit
G: First prison rape
L: First post AA date
M: First formaldehyde-induced erection
X: First necrophiliac

- Lefty