Today's Google Chow.

The Conservative Guide to Restoring the American Economy
(1) Devise simplistic method of imprisoning people for life.
" The third sin has done you in." "Dang!"
(Extra bonus points for rigging drug laws to favor whites.)
(2) Convert state prisons to privately-run businesses.
" McJail. Over 4 million incarcerated."
(Extra bonus points if government officials [Arizona!] get a taste of the action)
(3) (3) encourage rise in crime by off-shoring jobs and destroying
the mortgage system.
" Bye, hon. I'm off to work."
(Extra bonus points if perpetrators get obscenely-huge bonus for wrecking economy)
(4) Employ burgeoning prison population as slave labor for industry.
" Slave? I'll have you know I make 24 cents an hour!"
(Extra bonus points if convicts previously voted for you.)
Extra Credit Section
(5) Continue until at least half the U.S. population is permanently incarcerated.
" Sigh. I wonder how the other half lives?" "If I hear that one more time..."
(Extra bonus points if 100% of Californians are under lockup.)
(6) Celebrate victory as Chinese market is flooded with cheap prison-made consumer goods.
" Look, Honey! More Victoria's Secret!" "Oh, God!"
(Extra bonus points if "Not made in China, bitches!" appears on all products.)