Health Scare

By Grabthar's Hammer I swear that I will someday return to drawing comics that have nothing to do with that odious orange farticle accelerator.

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Bill Clinton lied about receiving oral sex from an adult intern. Result: Impeachment.

Donald Trump, according to just released files, reportedly used his stubby fingers to measure the relative tightness of the vaginas of little girls before auctioning them off to the highest bidders.

I did not expect to wake up this morning to learn that Congressional Republicans had bull-rushed the Oval Office and strangled Trump with his own entrails, or the nearest legal equivalent, but in any sort of functioning, law-abiding and, dare I say, christian-morals-infused democracy, they should have.

"Functioning".

I make myself laugh.

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Two men with Hispanic surnames shot an innocent White male U.S. citizen dead in the street but, so far, the Department of Justice has no plans to bring them to trial or deport them because they're the kind of murdering, criminal immigrant Trump likes.

Business as usual in the Golden Age.

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Here's a reason to not become a billionaire...

You spend your life drinking 200-year-old wine and eating wildly unobtainable foods like broiled hummingbird tongue and American bald eagle liver pate' and you eventually reach the point where you're left with nothing to do except being flown in your private airliner to remote islands and deflowering little girls alongside walking diarrhea like Trump and Epstein.

Here's to relative poverty.

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Every week I gather together twenty-four of the best editorial cartoons from the preceding week and post them on my RagingPencils Facebook page as "The Monday Morning Editorial Satire-A-Palooza".

People LOVE them but way too many think I am the one who created them even though the artists are given full credit and no two of them are in the same style.

People are weird. Sigh.

This week there was not one major player in the editorial cartooning biz who crafted a cartoon referencing the recently released Epstein files. This is not too surprising as newspapers don't routinely subject their readers to that kind of unsurpassed filth. It would be rather difficult to sell a 'toon to the Topeka Corn Plaster if the image portrays Trump in the process of using a micrometer to accurately measure the inside diameter of a Girl Scout's vagina.

But who's to say what will go down this week. Look out, Topeka!

- Lefty