Lettuce Spray

You know how many rules there are to be an atheist?

None.

Zero. Nada. The Big Freaking Void of Nothingness.

Contrast and compare that with the rules of being a modern, Republican Christian, which includes accepting Jesus as your personal Lord and Savior while at the same time giving him the big fat bloody booger-stained finger for being a woke, progressive liberal.

You know how many rules it takes not to be an asshole?

Just one: Don't be an asshole and, for Jesus's sake, stop voting Republican.

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It's not surprising that Donald "Grampa Simpson" Trump would look at an obviously Photoshop-ed image and swear it was real because Trump has all the mental horsepower of a Tamgotchi.

What's surprising is that of all the grifters and toadies who infest the White House not one could create a faked photo deftly enough that it would deceive anyone capable of empirical analysis. By that I mean anyone older than six years old.

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I kinda like the fact that "MS13" begins with the initials to my name and ends with one of my favorite numbers. For the record my other favorite numbers are 69, 666, 42 and 17, though I could have SWORN it looked like 18.

Also zero, which is considered both real and imaginary. Not unlike the way Republicans consider the U.S. Constitution.

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I got this in the mail from an admirer today. That's a 100% genuine Randi Rhodes body-flaw concealer.

Thank you, Admirable Person.

- Lefty