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The progressive web comic about privatizing the USPS.

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The Bride of Franking-Stein

Here's a nugget of optimism:

t-Rump is refusing to supply a DNA sample in his rape case involving Jean Carroll, and now he's illegally bringing the full weight of the DOJ against her.

But what if Mary Trump gives a DNA sample to the Carroll team? If it's a close match to the prosecution's sample t-Rump's defense, Barr or no Barr, falls right in the shitter.

Mary Trump is already tweeting with Carroll. This could be a significant thing.


t-Rump's next defense: "Your honor, we'd like to bring to the court's attention that Mr. Trump's body contains no DNA as he is the corporeal manifestation of God's love for all mankind. Thus we move that Ms. Carroll can go eat boogers! Neener-neener-neener!"


Yesterday I had to order a legal document from the county next to mine, a mere 45 minutes highway-time west of me. I was given two options for delivery:

1. USPS: Fifty cents.

1. UPS Air: $18.00.

And that's why Republicans want to privatize the USPS.


t-Rump wants to use the DOJ to defend his rape case. This is only slightly illegal in the same way that Krakatoa was slightly noisy.

When former-president Bill Clinton met then-AG Loretta Lynch on an airplane in 2016 the impropriety had even the "liberal" media gasping for air. Fox News, in their usual refined and dignified way, acted as though Bill had returned the Louisiana Purchase to the French for a handful of Quarter-Pounders and a skate key.

Today, Bill Barr is so far up t-Rump's ass he not only can count every kernel of corn but knows each of their children by name.

So far, Fox News' response has been muffled as their fangs were buried in t-Rump's tiny, drug-withered putz.


t-Rump: "I've rebuilt the U.S. military by giving it $2.3 trillion dollars to make ships and subs and planes and bombs."

Also t-Rump: "These generals of mine only want to go to war to benefit the weapons manufacturers."

< sound of forehead repeatedly striking rigid surface>


Racism and the American Presidency

1964, Johnson: "With the signing of the Civil Rights Act Democrats have lost the South for a long time."

1968, Nixon: "Thanks, by the way."

1972, Nixon: "This is great. I'll be King forever!"

1974, Ford: "What the Hell just happened?"

1976, Carter: "You screwed up so bad America elected a lusty peanut farmer."

1980, Reagan: "It's racism in America!"

1984, Reagan: "Before my mind goes, how about a 'drug war'? (Wink-wink)"

1988, GHW Bush: "Willie Horton! Willie Horton! Willie Horton!"

1992, GHW Bush: "That was fun. Think I'll do it again."

1992, Perot: "Nope."

1992, Clinton: "Thanks, Ross."

1996, Dole: "Enough with the racism already."

1996, Clinton: "Thanks, Bob."

2000, Bush: "Thanks, Supreme Court! Thanks evangelical voters who hate blow jobs more than eight years of economic growth, relative peace, and a budget surplus for the first time in forever."

2004: Bush: "Thanks, Ken Blackwell!"

2008, Obama: "Thanks, black voters. Coulda used you in 2000."

2012, Obama: "Thanks, again, black voters!"

2016, Trump: "Pssst! Racists. While the blacks aren't looking, vote for me."

2020, Trump: "I've done more for the blacks..."

2020, Blacks: "You go to Hell."


end rant

News & Notes for September 9, 2020

Michael Cohen: "Trump isn't joking about being president for twelve years."

GOP lawyer: "The evidence doesn't support Trump's claim of voter fraud."

Mail-order pharmacies report significant USPS drug delivery delays.

Trump concealed dangers of covid-19.

GOP-staffer tells cancer patient who needs insurance to essentially "Go fuck herself."

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Classic Raging Crappola
catoof for old people comic
The Catfood Commission.


Google Chow (Eat hearty, little Google-bots!)
how the post office works
You pay for postage and the mail is delivered.
How a privatized post office will work
You pay a lot more money for postage,
The new CEO takes some to buy a third yacht…
and the mail is delivered. (unless the president doesn't want it delivered for some reason.)

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