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The progressive web comic about Trump destroying the U.S. Post Office.




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Four-Alarm Fuhrer

Michelle Obama: "Let me be as honest and clear as I possibly can. Donald Trump is the wrong president for our country. He has had more than enough time to prove that he can do the job, but he is clearly in over his head. He cannot meet this moment ... It is what it is."

I could hear t-Rump's empty head go "FOOM!" all the way here in Texas.

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If every voter dropped their mail-in ballot at the post office on November 2nd it would get delivered in time to be counted.

Because the post office processes 500 million pieces of mail daily and there would be only 135 million mail-in ballots, at most. The U.S. Postal Service would hardly notice the difference... unless someone destroyed all the mail-sorting machines.

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I hear some people say that Dumpy Trumpy was born in Russia.

Dumpy Trumpy was not born in Russia, but he'll most likely die there as the country has no extradition laws with the U.S.

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If there was an Olympic event for "World's Shittiest Human-shaped Object" the results would be:

Gold - Trump
Silver - Bill Barr
Bronze - Louis DeJoy, a rabid weasel (Statistical tie)

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Captain Ouchie Foot wants to be president for life by cheating and swindling the electorate.

If Mr. Obama could have run for president again he would still be president today, by a large margin.

Because you know that everyone would have gotten to vote.

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Back in March I mass-emailed my family my views on the oncoming coronavirus pandemic. It wasn't a happy missive as I knew t-Rump would screw everything up but I offered two solutions:

1. Start testing everyone in the line of fire and forcibly isolate those who test positive.

2. Infect the entire populace simultaneously, let the weak die off, give our hearty new antibodies a rousing cheer and then resume partying where we left off.

The second suggestion was meant as gallows humor but I took heat for it anyway because it was such a cruel idea. How could anyone think such a thing?

But, yeah, it's exactly the policy that Fat Hitler subsequently imposed on this country by turning his back on science and going golfing. Current t-Rumpian dogma is "Get back to work and reopen the schools! Covid-19 isn't dangerous, you mewling Liberal worms! Cast off your silly masks and breathe deep the fresh air of Freedom! And for God's sake, stop testing! You're making me look bad."

I have no reassuring prediction for the future but I know we're all just one Cytokine storm away from death until there's a safe vaccine, which will take another six months, minimum. Even after that we're not out of the woods because covid-19 will remain in the environment for a very long time until each and every one of us is immunized.

But this is Anti-Vaxxer Land so don't buy any green bananas.

Fuck Trump.

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I have a ten-year-old outdoor cat. I've had him since he was a kitten. He's as black as a cat could ever be and hugely obese but very sweet. He's also suspicious of everything. If I carry his food out to him with an odd look in my eye, he's gone. But this suspicious nature, above all else, has kept him alive all these years.

Suspicious or not, he loves the mailman. I don't always have the same person deliver the mail each and every day but I've seen them, one and all, literally have to step over this little fat bastard to drop off my bills and he doesn't blink an eye.

This says a lot about mailmen and I think if my cat could vote he'd be a Biden guy, too.

=Lefty=

 
end rant






News & Notes for August 18, 2020

Trump loses it over Michelle Obama's convention speech.

Cheating is Trump's election strategy.

Senate finds that Trump's 2016 campaign chair had contacts with Russians.

Trump post office interference is leaving heart patients without their medicine.

Bernie Sanders: "Nero fiddled while Rome burned. Trump golfs."



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Google Chow (Eat hearty, little Google-bots!)
Reporter: Last month President Trump scrapped all the fire engines in order to cut costs and increase efficiency in the nation's fire departments.
Now the cities, notably many Democratic strongholds, are raging infernos. People are homeless and many are dying.
Mr. Trump was asked to comment on this situtation.
Trump in golf cart: This should bigly and stroghly stop mail-in voting fraud.





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