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Today's fortune cookie
Grandma knits an anatomically correct sex doll.


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Raging Pencils is a hand-made conceit of:

Mike Stanfill, Private Hand
Mike Stanfill, Private Hand
IllustrationFlash AnimationWeb Design

www.privatehand.com

Stinkin' Rules

Whether you know it or not there are actual rules of the internet. Exactly how many is open to conjecture as the list is, well, uncertain since the numbering system doesn't seem to follow any logical format. However, here are some of my favorites:

-2. Never argue with the Ninja Unicorn- refer to rule 14.

14. Do not argue with trolls — it means that they win.

17. Every win fails eventually.

29. On the internet, all girls are men, and all kids are undercover FBI agents.

34. There is porn of it, no exceptions.

35. If no porn is found of it, it will be made.

36. There will always be more fucked up shit than what you just saw.

43. The more beautiful and pure a thing is, the more satisfying it is to corrupt it.

49. One cat leads to another.

61. Chuck Norris is the exception to Rule #63, no exceptions or else.

63. There is always a female version of a male character (and vice versa). No Exceptions.

82. Nobody tells the truth on the Internet.

89. Bruce Lee was an hero to us all.

116. Combo breakers are inevitable. If the combo is completed successfully, it is gay.

117. Always go out of your way to make newbies feel uncomfortable.

153. It's funny to pick on people's grammar no matter how good it is. No exceptions.

170. None of us is as cruel as all of us.

198. If it's not on Google, It does not exist. No Exceptions.

9020. If you're wondering where rule 9019 went, refer to rule 404.

8675309. Jenny is not home, she will never be home. No Exceptions.

That's enough for now but I encourage you to go read the entire list of arbitrary 'net rules yourself.
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Shameless Plug

I don't do much eBaying these days but here's a special little something I'm selling for a friend:

It's a Paillard-Bolex H8 8mm movie camera. Absolutely perfect condition. They started making this model back in the thirties and kept producing it, with improvements, all the way into the sixties. This is what a camera should look like. National Geographic loved these babies.

(Adendum: The auction was a huge susccess and helped out a good friend in need. Thanks to any and all visitors to this site who might have placed a bid.)


=lefty=



end rant


Raging Pencils salutes the Mystery Readers of
Reservoir, Victoria
Whoever you are, thanks for reading my fractious little 'toon.


end rant


A blast from the mythical past. The RP from 2-2-09.

olympic sports programming network

end rant


Can't make sense of the news? Try our selection of progressive nosh:
DailykosCrooks and LiarsThink ProgressTalking Points Memo



Today's Google Chow.

Three college students loking at love doll in gift box.

First guy: Yeah, it's just what it looks like. A hand-knitted, anatomically-correct love doll.

Second guy: What does the card say?

Third guy: Remember, kiddo, Rule 34 is older than you think. Happy Birthday. Love Grandma.